1 John 4:18 // “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.”

A childhood friend of mine asked me the other day at the airport what makes you scared. I couldn’t really think of anything at that moment, partly because it was early in the morning and partly because I didn’t want to say it right then and there. Not where other people were listening to our conversation so I chose to joke that I was fearless.

I truly believe people can be fearless. And we should be fearless because there is no fear in love. When you trust in God, there is nothing in this world apart from Him that you should fear. And when I talk about fearing God, that is not saying you should be scared to come to God. (another topic for another day because I know what it means to be afraid of coming to Him at times)

What I mean by fearing God = having a deep reverence for His mighty power.

Something that’s been near/dear to me lately is the fear of judgment. Not of God’s judgment Himself which I should be more worried about because He is just and therefore the only judge of our lives…but the judgment of brothers and sisters in Christ who are older than me. (and therefore probably more spiritually mature) I’ve always looked up to those who are farther in their spiritual walks. It definitely makes it a little hard to open up to them when I don’t feel like my spiritual level measures up quite yet.

By nature I’m super easygoing and chill and relaxed and pretty much everything that goes against how I used to try to act in spiritual settings. I’ve noticed people like to pretend to be really intensely spiritual. (idk if that even made sense, unless they really are that spiritual then woooo you go) So when I’m placed in those intensely spiritual situations and meeting after meeting setting, I actually tense up and get kind of uncomfortable.

We all fear not measuring up to how spiritual those who surround us are at some point. This must stop. Human beings are all a bit self-conscious to an extent…I’m not really that self-conscious anymore thankfully but I wouldn’t say I’m not self-conscious at all. I think if we lay our fears down at Jesus’ feet (this conversation goes back to wccc with my lovely roommate G) and stop focusing on ourselves, we won’t fear sharing with our brothers and sisters. We won’t even care how they perceive us if our eyes are on Him. Satan can really break that unity in the body by placing stupid fears and misconceptions that he creates…and most of the times they’re not even true. And I really need to realize that and let Him guide me.

I’ve been committing more in letting the Spirit lead lately instead of taking control of my own life as I did in previous months. And as one of the most stubborn people you’ll ever meet (yes I just admitted it and won’t admit it ever again muahaha) it’s hard for me to lay down my self and let Jesus guide. In this new month I am and it feels so darn refreshing.

Cheers to being (one step closer) to my goal<–> follow me in my journey by reaching out to me this summer. I’d love to see where y’all are at.

p.s. today I’m officially 19.5 whatttttt July went by in a jiffff


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